


Eyes of the Nein

by Pawthorn



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Campaign 2 (Critical Role), Critical Role Spoilers, Friendship, Gen, Mighty Nein as Family, Protectiveness, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-14 01:27:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28538088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pawthorn/pseuds/Pawthorn
Summary: Post Episode 120Six vignettes of reactions and conversations revolving on the strange connection between Lucienand Caduceus Clay.
Relationships: Caduceus Clay & The Mighty Nein
Comments: 21
Kudos: 75





	1. Beau

**Author's Note:**

> The Lucien and Caduceus interactions of 120 lit a fire in my MIND. So here's the Cad-focused result. Each chapter will be a different M9 POV, some just internal dialogue, some scenes. It heats up a bit later on, but there's still not much plot.  
> Enjoy!

Beau didn't like it.

Not one bit.

Yes, traveling with the Tomb Takers was probably the best outcome they could have hoped for, given the scenario. Yes, relations between the two groups had been polite, if tense, as they traveled. They had dealt with threats together and found some common ground.

But Lucien…

Maybe she could see it more clearly, because she hadn't built Mollymauk up in her head the way the others had. Yeah, he had inspired her to be a better person, but it wasn't because he was perfect. It was because he was an asshole. He was a liar and a show-off and way too sure of himself. And if an asshole like him could make the world a better place, she figured she could probably do the same.

So, when she saw flashes of familiarity in this person- and god, there were so many- it stung, but it didn't disarm her. She was on her guard, suspicious and defensive.

Maybe that's why it bothered her so much.

The way he was with Caduceus.

Lucien had taken to walking with Caduceus as they trekked across the frozen fields. Not all the time, but often. Certainly more than he chose to engage with the rest of them. That wasn't necessarily suspicious in itself, but the way he talked to Caduceus felt… off. He listened too intently, watched too closely. While Caduceus' eyes generally stayed placidly on the horizon during their conversations, Lucien's bore into Caduceus, drinking in his reactions. Something there intrigued and interested him. And yes, Caduceus was an interesting guy with lots of… unique ideas about the world. But zealots like Lucien didn't really care about things like that. He wanted something. Beau could feel it.

A week ago, Beau would've left it to Caduceus. But her friend was clearly pretty vulnerable at the moment. Aeor was really fucking with him; the forest, the City, the whole fucking place seemed out to get him. She didn't expect Caduceus to change allegiance or anything- he was the most committed person she had ever met- but they didn't know the full extent of Lucien's powers. Being singled out at all was cause for concern.

Well, Lucien wasn't the only one with many eyes. She and the rest of the Nein would watch Caduceus' back. And if Lucien tried anything, she at least wouldn't hesitate to put him back in the ground.


	2. Yasha

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yasha has a conversation.

Feelings roiled in Yasha's chest as she watched Moll- no, _Lucien_ slip away from her yet again. She let him walk away, frustrated. He moved to the front of the group as they trekked across the wilderness. His steps were light despite the deep snow, with a quirky little bounce that was painful in its familiarity.

She didn't know what she had expected. He obviously didn't care about his time with her, with the Nein. But she couldn't help trying to talk to him, to make him remember.

She hadn't gotten to say goodbye to Molly. That fact still haunted her. But she had grieved. She thought she had let go. And now, he was _here_ , walking and breathing.

And he wanted nothing to do with her.

She fell in step with Zoran, the goliath, who nodded in greeting. She was as comfortable with him as any of the other Tomb Takers. She respected his abilities and strength, if not his chosen path. They walked in silence for a while.

"Your leader," she said at last. "He really doesn't want to acknowledge his time with us, does he? Don't you think that's odd?"

"Not really," said Zoran, after a moment's thought. "Let me ask you, if you had someone highjack your body while you weren't there, do all sorts of things you'd never do, would you want to talk to their friends all about it? Have a laugh at what happened?"

Yasha's stomach dropped. Her hands went numb as she tried to keep her expression neutral.

It wasn't the same thing. _It wasn't_.

"Anyway," Zoran said over the screaming in her mind. "Maybe it's less that he's avoiding you and more that he wants to talk to someone else."

She looked ahead to where Lucien was walking with Caduceus. A lance of sorrow cut though her spiraling emotions, helping her regain control. She had often pictured Molly and Caduceus meeting, talking, getting to know each other. She always thought they'd get along well.

"Well," she said. "Caduceus is the only one of us who never met Mollymauk. So he doesn't have the same baggage."

"Maybe so," Zoran said. "But Lucien probably would've taken an interest anyway. He's drawn to outsiders, folks who don't fit in. That's what each of us were, before joining him. Alone. Looking for a purpose and a place to belong."

"Caduceus isn't alone," Yasha said, startled. "He's one of us. He's part of the Mighty Nein."

Zoran raised an eyebrow before shrugging and moving ahead to talk with Cree.

Yasha trudged on in quiet thought for a long time, feet sinking heavily into the icy snow. Staring at the two colorful figures ahead. Thinking of friendship.

And loss.


	3. Caleb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb watches the watcher.

"So, he burst out of the window," Fjord laughed. "Glass everywhere, added to the mess he had made earlier--"

"That whole thing was a real shit show," Veth added smirking.

"Points for creativity though," Fjord said. "I've never seen a disguise kit used quite _that_ way. Do you remember--"

Caleb rolled his eyes as Fjord continued his story. The Nein and the Tomb Takers had all gathered around a communal fire for a midday rest. Fjord and Veth had decided it was a good time to reminisce. Very loudly. About Mollymauk.

Caleb appreciated what they were trying to do. Lucien's stubborn refusal to acknowledge Molly as a person was infuriating. Painful. So, wanting to rub his face in it was understandable. And it was good to remember, to laugh and smile, filled with warm memories of their friend.

All the same, he didn't think their antics were having the desired effect. 

The Tomb Takers seemed decidedly unimpressed by the stories. Lucien himself listened with detached good humor. And his eyes continually slid away from the storytellers.

To Caduceus.

Never one for chatter, their tall friend was especially quiet now, with nothing to share or add. It suddenly occurred to Caleb that they had never told these stories to Caduceus- they were as new to him as they were to Lucien. Caleb recognized the look that had lit on Caduceus face. That quiet, patient smile he got sometimes. Like when there was only meat served at breakfast. Or when Fjord called him Molly by accident.

A man like Lucien would watch for that look.

It was strange to see the eager, calculating expression Lucien now wore on Molly's face. It was a good reminder that they were not dealing with Mollymauk. Not now, at least. Lucien was a different sort of person. Caleb had known people like Lucien. He had been used by people like Lucien.

That would not happen to any member of Caleb's new family. Not if he had anything to say about it.

With a snap of his fingers, Frumpkin appeared in Caduceus' lap, and began stretching and making biscuits on his knee. Caleb watched as surprise replaced the lonesome expression on Caduceus' face. Quiet warmth filled his eyes, as he glanced to Caleb with a grateful nod. Yasha moved closer to him on one side to scritch Frumpkin's chin, and Jester nudged herself under Caduceus' other arm to lean against him.

Caleb was continually astonished at the large impact a small kindness could have. It felt good and right, though still surprising and new, to be the one to bestow such a kindness.

As Veth began a new story (one that seemed designed purely to embarrass Fjord, which Caduceus had plenty of context for,) Caleb looked at Lucien. A flash of something that might have been annoyance passed over his face for the briefest instant. Then, the confident grin was back as he shifted position and locked eyes with Caleb. He gave a nod- of concession?- looking back over the group. But his eyes continually returned to their pink-haired friend.

 _Try something,_ Caleb thought. _And see what happens._

Warmth of the ever-present fire within surged through him in a wave. No one would hurt or manipulate his friends.

No one.


	4. Fjord

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fjord observant by nature.  
> Sometimes he missed things.  
> Important things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wooooo. So this turned into a character study... And probably the most intense scene in this... I like Fjord, okay?

Fjord was not observant by nature.

He didn't pick up on cues, and he was rarely the first to see or hear or smell something in the environment. Even when he tried, the ability to focus on such details often eluded him. It had gotten him into trouble a lot when he was younger. He missed or misunderstood what was going on around him. Whether walking through a field or working through a conversation, it was the same. He'd trip or tangle, stumbling his way through awkwardly. People looked askance, taking confusion and ignorance as rudeness or malice.

The sea had been his escape. Sailors didn't care about nuance and nicety; they cared about hard work and a job well done. So he worked. With a smooth, consistent deck under him, he memorized the position of each sheet, learned to tie knots with practiced efficiency. The clear, unchanging columns of the ship's manifest were another comfort. From the ship's cradle of rules and regularity, he learned to face the wild, unpredictability of the sea, and of life. He learned to act, to control the situation. With power and momentum on his side, he didn't need to watch it listen as closely. He navigated life like a blade, cutting through and dealing with consequences as they appeared. It worked for him.

But sometimes, he missed things.

Important things.

"Fjord," Beau called, pulling him aside as Caleb prepared the Tower for the evening. The Nein would be sharing it with the Tomb Takers that night. None of their group liked inviting them in, but they were all exhausted from a brutal day in the tundra. And the Tomb Takers weren't going to take "no" for an answer.

Fjord glanced around as he and Beau stepped away from the group. No one seemed to be watching.

"I need you to do something for me," she said, eyes roaming the area around them. "I'm gonna be.. uh… busy. For a little while. After dinner. So-"

"Busy with what?"

"It's fuckin' private," Beau growled. "And not the point. Just listen. I need you to keep an eye on Caduceus. I've got a bad feeling."

"What?" Fjord's stomach swooped as he looked toward his friend, who was watching the snow drift around them. He seemed alright. "What do you think--"

"Finished," Caleb said as the shimmering doorway of the tower appeared. Fjord and Beau's small moment of privacy evaporated.

"Just do it, okay?" Beau said, and headed for the door without waiting for acknowledgement.

_What. The. Fuuuuuuck?_

Fjord forced the concern and confusion from his face and followed the others inside. He would do as Beau asked, though he didn't understand why she had asked it of him. What danger did she expect inside the Tower, and for Caduceus specifically?

Fjord kept his eyes on his friend as they all shared an evening meal. He seemed alright to Fjord. He ate as much as he normally did. He listened more than he talked, as usual. Fjord had no idea what the problem might be. And he couldn't ask Beau, who disappeared mid-way through their meal.

Members of both parties began to wander out of the dining hall as they finished eating. Eventually only he, Caleb, and the two Clerics remained.

"Well," said Caduceus, stretching and yawning. "I suppose it's time to settle-in for the night."

"I need to visit the kitchen first," Jester said, rising. "I have something special in mind for breakfast, and I want to make sure the cats get it just right."

"We probably should stick together, in pairs, just in case," Caleb said. "Fjord, you could stay-"

"I'll go with Caduceus," Fjord interrupted. "There are entirely too many cats in that kitchen for my liking."

Caleb looked surprised, but seemed to accept his reasoning. He bid them a quick goodnight, then hurried after Jester, who was halfway to the kitchens already. Fjord and Caduceus made their way to the center of the tower, then up, in companionable silence.

"Night, Fjord," Caduceus said once they reached his floor, halting his ascent and walking toward his room with a lazy, backwards wave.

"Good night, 'Deuces," Fjord said as he drifted upward to his floor. He hesitated on the landing, watching from above as Caduceus entered his room and shut the door behind him. Fjord shifted in place, uncertain how long he needed to keep watch. If he knew what Beau was worried about--

The sound of a door opening below, beyond his range of vision, halted his thoughts. Instinctively, he sunk into the shadows, eyes still trained on Caduceus door.

He had a perfect view of Lucien approaching it.

Fjord tensed as the tiefling knocked. After a few moments, the door opened, and Caduceus stuck his head out, looking surprised. Fjord's pulse hammered in his ears while the two of them exchanged a few sentences. Distance ate up the words, but their tones and postures seemed non-combative. Even so, Fjord was ready to summon the sword and spring to his friend's defense.

Then, still looking perfectly at ease, Caduceus stepped aside, let Lucien in, and shut the door behind them.

_Oh. Shit._

For a moment, Fjord just stared, mind sputtering in shock. Then he launched himself down to the floor below, hurrying to the door. He raised his hand to knock, then reached for the door handle instead, then stepped back, running a hand over his face. Quietly, he pressed his ear to the door. He couldn't hear anything from within, not over the loud and rapid thumping of his own heart.

_Dammit!_

Now he knew exactly why Beau had asked him to watch Caduceus. She had known something like this would happen. But Fjord had been too slow, and now, their friend was alone with Lucien. And Fjord had no idea what to do about it.

Part of him knew Caduceus could take care of himself. When push came to shove, he could defend himself, heal himself. And he was good at reading people. Surely he wouldn't have invited Lucien in if he sensed danger. At the same time, Caduceus could be shockingly naive at times, and none of them really knew what Lucien was capable of.

Well, that wasn't strictly true. The memory of finding Vess' body flashed behind his eyes. For an instant, he saw Caduceus there instead- tall form crumpled on the floor, pale and cold, frozen look of fear in his eyes, and rivulets of blood stark against the soft fur of his face.

Fjord shook his head to clear the image, fighting against the cold dread building in his stomach.

No, he couldn't just leave Caduceus in there.

But should he burst in? Knock and make up some excuse to enter? What if that made things worse? Fjord knew he might not be able to help Caduceus on his own. But there was no one around, and he couldn't risk leaving--

The light patter of paws nearby interrupted his thoughts. He turned and saw three cats walking one of the elevated paths, carrying an assortment of foods as well as a bottle of something.

"Hey!" he whispered up at them, as loudly as he dared. "Come down here, one of you! I have a task for you!"

They gazed at him inscrutably for a long moment. Then, one of them gave an irritated mew and unloaded its burdens onto the other two. As the over-loaded pair continued on their way, the raminaing cat scrambled down the scaffolding to sit before Fjord, tail twitching.

Fjord knelt, ignoring the way his nose began to itch.

"I want you to go into that room," he said, pointing to Caduceus' door. "There are two men in there. One is purple. With horns. If he hurts or threatens the tall man, or if the tall man looks afraid or in trouble, come out of there yowling as loud as you can. Then, go downstairs and find Caleb, get him and Jester to come. Try not to be seen. Hurry!"

The cat sneezed at him, then pranced to the cat-door and disappeared inside.

Fjord stood there, tense and ready. A minute passed. Then two. Fjord began to pace, quietly. He glared at the door, clenching his fists in readiness as time stretched on and his mind raced.

Why would Caduceus let Lucien in in the first place? He dismissed the question almost immediately. Caduceus 'it's always worth making friends' Clay had thought it would be _rude_ to keep the Tomb Takers waiting. Fjord would have been more surprised if Caduceus had shut the door in Ludien's face.

A better question was, why had Lucien singled out Caduceus? If it was an attack, it made sense to start with their most powerful healer. But if that was the case, why go alone? 

Time dragged on.

What could they be talking about in there? Was Lucien needling Caduceus for information? Trying to manipulate him? Fjord couldn't imagine Lucien finding success with either attempt, but it made Fjord angry, nonetheless.

Caduceus was kind, almost to a fault. He cared for people, believed in them when they couldn't do it themselves. That care, that belief had helped to save Fjord, quite literally. Phrases floated through his mind... _It takes a particular flavor of goodness… That's what a champion is… Proud to know you…_ Caduceus thought so much better of him than Fjord had ever thought of himself. It was part of what made Caduceus who he was.

To think of Lucien taking advantage of Caduceus' nature, to imagine him trying to use Caduceus for his own ends… It made Fjord's chest flare with the heat of righteous anger, compelling him to move, act, protect. But all he could do was wait.

Finally, he heard movement from within. He ducked into the shadows as the door finally swung open. Lucien walked out as Caduceus stood in the doorway, looking no worse for wear. They bid each other goodnight briefly, the door closed, and Lucien stepped away. As he turned, Fjord saw the cat he had sent to spy on them, cradled in Lucien's arms, purring contentedly, and looking utterly unrepentant.

Lucien turned to look directly at Fjord, cocking his head slightly.

"You could have joined us, you know," he said lightly. "Instead of moping outside like a puppy that lost its bone."

Fjord stepped forward, crossing his arms, trying to relax the tension in his neck and shoulders.

"Seemed like it might be a private conversation," he said. "Since you sought him out alone. In his room. After most everyone has gone to sleep for the night."

"Is that what it seemed like?" Lucien smiled, scratching the cat's ears. "Why then did you wait outside at all? Why send this one in to watch us?"

"I don't know," Fjord said. "Maybe because the last time you were alone with someone of my acquaintance, they wound up dead."

"You think I'd kill your friend," Lucien said, moving closer. "In the middle of the night? When we'd just agreed to travel together."

"I don't know what to expect from you," Fjord said. "But no. I suppose if I truly thought you meant to harm him… well. Tonight would have turned out very differently."

"I don't doubt it," Lucien smiled.

"So," Fjord said. "What were you two talking about? You were in there a while."

"Oh, this and that," Lucien said, strolling closer to Fjord, still petting the damned cat. "I like interesting people. Curious people. Your friend seems to as well. He's quite the conversationalist."

"He does have a way with words," Fjord agreed, forcibly willing himself not to back away from Lucien. There was something just… off about him. He was so similar to Molly, which made the edge of wrongness to him all the plainer.

"True," Lucien said. "I'm very interested in his way of speaking. For example, have you ever noticed he doesn't use the word 'we' when he talks about your group? That he says 'they' instead?"

"No," Fjord lied. Because of course he had. He didn't understand why Caduceus did that. He didn't like Lucien bringing it up now.

"Well," Lucien said, with a knowing twinkle in his eye. "I noticed. That's the sort of thing that catches my attention. It's one of my interests, you see."

"What is?"

"Lost souls," Lucien said. "People looking for belonging. And purpose."

"Sorry to say, that isn't Caduceus," Fjord said, heat building in his chest again. "He has friends, he has family, a place with us and a purpose. There's nothing you could offer him that wouldn't be a step down from what he already has."

"Well," Lucien said, with that same infuriating grin. "That being the case, my talking with him, explaining what I have to offer, that shouldn't bother you at all."

"And yet, I find myself bothered," Fjord stepped closer, meeting Lucien's eyes, letting the weight of his gaze carry his meaning. "And, I would consider it a personal favor if you would leave my friend alone from now on. Or I might have to show you and your friends just how bothered I am."

Lucien cocked his head to the side.

"Is that supposed to be a threat?" He said with a chuckle. "Friend, you have no idea what you're dealing with here. There are forces at work right now, bigger than any of us. Like it or not, your friend is smack in the middle of it, and I'm not going to ignore that. You'd best get used to that idea."

"I don't care what forces you claim to understand or work for," Fjord said, reckless anger boiling up from his chest. "If you put him in danger, I will end you. We will end you. He is not alone, and if harm comes to him because of you, we will deal with you, and I will personally ensure that no resurrection can bring you back again."

Lucien looked at Fjord for a long moment, absently scratching the cat.

"See, now _that_ sounded like a proper threat," he said at last, eyes gleaming. "And I'd expect nothing less from you. You- only seeing what's right in front of you. No mind for possibilities, or potential. Folk like you have their uses. But without the proper guidance, you are painfully oblivious. Take comfort in the fact that, if I do decide to do anything to your friend, you won't even notice until it's far too late to stop me. So--"

"Is everything alright?"

Caleb's voice broke through the red haze that had all but overtaken Fjord's vision. He and Lucien turned to see the wizard and Jester as they finished their ascent from the floor below and stepped onto the landing, looking wary.

Lucien stepped back from Fjord easily, draping the cat over his shoulder.

"We were just discussing how nice it is to be traveling with new friends," he smiled, breezing across the landing. "Thank you again for your hospitality. Sweet dreams."

Throwing a final, mocking smile in Fjord's direction, he slipped into the spare room, door shutting gently behind him. With some effort, Fjord unclenched his fists. He knew Jester and Caleb were both looking at him, expecting an explanation, but they seemed far away at the moment.

Fjord stared at his hands. They were shaking. There were small crescent indentations in his palms, left by his fingernails. He had been moments from summoning the Star-Razor. To what sane end, he couldn't say. But he still wanted to. He wanted to wipe the smug smile off of Lucien's face, to make him regret his words.

Fjord wanted to protect his family.

But he hadn't.

He hadn't noticed Lucien's intentions toward Caduceus. He hadn't been aware of the danger. He'd done _nothing_ to prevent Lucien from getting to his friend. And he'd done nothing to keep Caduceus safe moving forward.

"Fjord," Jester was saying. "What happened?"

"Nothing," he said, striding to the center of the chamber. "Nothing at all."

He needed space, or he was going to let his anger boil over and scald someone who didn't deserve it. He paused before ascending.

"Just, keep your guard up," he said, glancing toward Caduceus room. "And put the guest room on a different fucking floor."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This scene is the first that popped into my head and inspired the rest of the fic. Based largely on Fjord threatening the scrying orb (while wearing the necklace of non detection lol.)


	5. Jester

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jester and Caduceus have tea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a bit of speculation here about Caduceus' thought process and motivation. But it's mostly soft Team Cleric goodness.

Jester rapped her knuckles sharply on Caduceus' door. She and Caleb had agreed that, if Fjord wanted Lucien away from this floor, it probably had something to do with Caduceus. Yasha wasn't even in her room tonight. She was busy with… other things. And besides, Lucien had been spending a LOT of time with Caduceus. So, it only made sense for Jester to check on Caduceus and see how he was doing.

She waited patiently for her friend to answer, watching as Caleb continued his ascent to his room. After a few moments, the door swung open, revealing Caduceus' curious face. His expression shifted to a rueful smile when he saw her.

"Jester," he said. "What can I do for you?"

"Oh, nothing at all, Caduceus,"I just wanted to see how you were doing, that's all. It's been a hard few days."

"That it has," he said, eyes tired. "Well, come in. I'll start brewing another pot of tea."

Jester followed Caduceus inside, closing the door behind her. She watched as Caduceus removed a used tea cup, not his own, from a table by the fire. He set it aside before busying himself with the kettle.

"Did you already have company?" She asked, plopping into one of the soft sofas.

"I did," Caduceus answered as he measured out dried leaves into his teapot. "Your friend. From before. He asked to join me in here for some conversation, not too long ago."

Well, that would explain why Fjord was upset. It was hard to trust Lucien, given the damage he had caused, and what he was planning to do. Even so, Jester hoped there was still some shadow of Molly within him. She sensed that Fjord wasn't quite so optimistic. Maybe he was right.

"He's not really our friend, Caduceus," she said. "Not anymore. You should be careful around him. Remember what he did to Vess Derogna."

"I'm aware," Caduceus said, bringing over a fully laden tea tray and setting it on the table before them. "I didn't get the sense that he would try anything like that tonight. And I can't imagine how hurting me would further his goals. He's gone through a lot of effort not to pick a fight, so far."

"That's true," said Jester. She swung her feet up onto the couch beside her, but left room for Caduceus as he settled. "So, what did he want?"

"What does anyone want?" Caduceus sighed. "To be heard. To be understood. To share a different perspective."

"About the Eyes of Nine?"

"That, and other things," Caduceus said. "I'll admit, he does have... a way with words."

"Yeah," said Jester. "So did Molly. He was a lot like you in that way. He really knew what he thought about the world, you know? And he knew how he wanted to live, what kind of mark he wanted to leave behind."

Caduceus' ears fell slightly. His brow furrowed as he met her statement with silence.

"I think the tea's done," he said after a moment, and began pouring, not meeting her eyes.

"Caduceus," she prodded. "Is everything alright?"

He sighed, setting the teapot aside and carefully handing her a cup. She waited for him to gather his thoughts, savoring the warmth and smell of the tea. It was a soothing, spiced blend of Caduceus', with licorice root, cardamom, cinnamon, about a dozen other flavors she couldn't identify, and just a hint of sweetness. Caduceus tended to brew it when the Nein were stressed or overtired.

"I've been… struggling a bit," he said. She put a hand on his arm and waited for him to continue. "I've always been aware of my purpose. Since I was born, or at least, since I was old enough to understand such things. It's changed over the years. And sometimes it gets cloudy."

"Like when we accidentally became pirates?" She asked, with a gentle grin.

"Exactly," he said, smiling back. "And sometimes it takes help from somebody like you to see the path again. But this time…"

Caduceus paused, looking into his cup. Steam swirled around his face.

"I thought I knew the next steps," he said. "Help you all achieve whatever your next goals are. Keep everybody alive, encourage some self-examination, keep anybody from unleashing anything terrible on the world."

Jester laughed a little. That sounded about right.

"But now," he continued. "I really hate that City. It needs to be stopped. I want to stop it."

"Me too," Jester whispered.

"It seems like your old friend wants to bring it over from the Astral Sea. That cannot be allowed to happen."

He looked up at her, eyes grave.

"But you all know a different side of this person," he said. "Someone you cared for. Someone you want to save. If stopping him meant killing him, could you do it? Even if you could, is that a burden _you_ need to bear?"

Silence fell between them as Jester absorbed his words. And their implications.

"We couldn't bear it, but you could?" She asked. But it wasn't really a question. She understood his meaning, though it chilled her to hear Caduceus say it so plainly.

"That's my thought," he nodded. "I hope it doesn't come to that. That's why I've been so open to his conversation. Maybe we can find some common ground, stop all this nonsense before it goes any further. At the very least, I can get a little more insight into his plans, his motivation. But if it comes to it… I'm the one who's known from the beginning that this City is a threat. I'm the one with no prior connection to the man trying to bring it here. That feels like direction. Like purpose."

"Maybe," Jester agreed, gripping his arm gently. "But you don't need to carry all of that yourself, Caduceus. We're with you. Maybe your purpose is just _being_ with us. Doing whatever seems right in the moment, you know?"

Caduceus looked at her within wide eyes, surprised and almost stricken. Then, his expression shifted to a gentle fondness.

"You're very clever, do you know that Ms. Lavorre?" He said, shifting his position until his shoulder touched hers. "Very wise."

She smiled bashfully, taking a prim sip of tea as she felt Caduceus relax beside her.

"Just remember," she said. "We're here for you. You've helped each of us so much. Let us return the favor."

"I'll try," Caduceus said, leaning his cheek on the top of her head. "Thank you."

They sat together, in silence, enjoying the warmth.


	6. Veth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Veth's mission is interrupted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look, it's a Veth POV! This is very new to me, and I hope it comes across alright. I didn't want to leave any of the Nein out, but I don't have the clearest grasp of her and Cad's relationship or her voice. I think I'm happy with where this went though.

Veth barrelled into Caduceus' room without knocking.

"Alright, where are those fuckers?" She yelled. "Are they in here? Are you hiding them?"

She slammed the door behind her as Caduceus and Jester looked over. They were sitting together by the fire, looking cozy, comfortable, and completely innocent.

Which Veth found extremely suspicious.

"Uh…" said Caduceus. "No?"

"You didn't even ask who I was talking about," she said as she approached the couch, crossbow loaded and ready. "If you're not hiding anyone, how do you already know who I'm looking for?"

"I don't," said Caduceus. "But I'm not hiding anyone. So I don't have to ask who you're looking for to know I haven't hid them."

Veth did a little verbal math before nodding.

"Alright, you're off the hook," she set her sights on Jester. "What about you, Lavorre? You're awfully quiet over there..."

"Who are you looking for, Veth?" Jester asked, calmly sipping her tea.

"Why are you asking!?" Veth demanded. "Like Caduceus said, an innocent person wouldn't need to ask!"

"To be fair," Caduceus said. "She might be hiding somebody you're not looking for. Seems wrong to force her to give that information up, if it's not what you need."

"That's true, Veth," Jester nodded. "Do you really want me to divulge all my private contacts, when you might not even care about them?"

Veth hesitated.

"I mean, yeah," she said. "I kind of want to hear who's on that list…"

"Veth!"

"Okay, okay," she disarmed her crossbow and threw herself into a chair across from the Clerics. "It's Beau and Yasha! Beau and I had it all sorted out. I was going to take tonight to spend some quality time with Yasha, and Beau was going to do the same with Caduceus. But I've been searching this place since after dinner, and I can't find either of them anywhere! So, do you think we should tell the others? Form search parties?"

Jester and Caduceus shared a look of… amusement maybe?

"I think that Beau probably misunderstood you," Jester shrugged. "Maybe she and Yasha are hanging out somewhere and you just missed them."

"Maybe," Veth said, accepting the tea Caduceus poured out and handed her. "These Tomb Takers are dangerous though. None of us should be running around playing hide-and-seek while they're here. And we _definitely_ shouldn't be alone with any of them."

At that, Caduceus winced and Jester nervously sipped her tea.

"Okay, what was that?!" Veth said.

"What!?" Jester said.

"Jester," Veth said, leaning forward. "Have you been alone with one of them? It's the halfling, isn't it? You're trying to cut me out of the detective agency!"

"Stop," Caduceus said. "It wasn't her. It was me. I had tea with Lucien. Nothing happened. It's fine."

"What!?" Veth said. "Why would you do that? He murders people, Caduceus!"

"Well, he didn't murder me," Caduceus said, bristling slightly.

"But we don't know what other powers he has," Veth said. "He could have brainwashed you. You could be one of his hive-mind now!"

"Then I guess you shouldn't drink any more of that tea," Caduceus said mildly, sipping from his own cup.

Veth looked from her cup to Caduceus and back again.

"Kidding," he said. "Honestly, Ms. Veth, we had a perfectly normal, civil conversation. Nothing to worry about."

"But you didn't even know Molly," Veth said, still trying to wrap her brain around unassuming, mild-mannered Caduceus having tea with Lucien. "What could you even talk about? You have nothing in common!"

"What do I have in common with _any_ of you?" Caduceus said sharply.

The statement landed like an anvil. Silence stretched uncomfortably for a long moment.

"Oh!" Jester said with forced cheer. "I know something the three of us have in common. We've all got families who love us!"

Some of the tension drained from the room, but a new heaviness replaced it. A heaviness Veth knew she shared with Caduceus.

"You're right, Jester, we do," Caduceus said, eyes sliding from Veth's. "How are things with Ms. Marion? Has she heard from the Gentleman recently?"

It was a good deflection, and Veth was grateful for it. As Jester launched into her answer, Veth took a moment to breathe through the sudden tide of emotions that gripped her. Longing, worry, love, guilt… And looking at Caduceus, she knew she wasn't the only one feeling it.

Caduceus understood what the responsibility was like, not just to have a family, but to have a family _waiting for you._ A family _to go back to_. It was different for Jester. Her parents didn't expect her to return, not permanently, anyway. After all, she was a kid, and kids are supposed to be free to go out into the world…

She stumbled in her own thinking as she looked at Caduceus. He wasn't a wise old sage, not really. She had known it when he first tried alcohol. When he sat, shivering and small, on the deck of a ship. When he played that ridiculous bone flute. When he ran to his mom and she scooped him up in a hug. When he didn't notice that he was being propositioned. When he had tea with a dangerous stranger and thought nothing of it. He was as young as Jester, really.

"...And you know, I just realized, I still have some spells left," Jester was saying. "I think I'm going to go Send some messages to my parents!"

She hopped off of the sofa, and started toward the door. Caduceus rose to walk her to the doorway, and stayed there to watch her ascend safely to her room. Closing the door with a gentle click, he returned to his place and settled with a sigh.

"She seems happy," he said. "That's good. The last few days have been hard on her."

"Not just her," Veth said.

"True," Caduceus sighed. "Sorry for snapping earlier."

"No, no," Veth waved him off. "I shouldn't have pushed."

Veth took a moment to study Caduceus. He looked small in this room. It was the way he held himself, Veth realized. He was used to taking up less space, keeping everything contained to fit surroundings that weren't built with him in mind. In a room filled with furniture his size, he seemed diminished, swallowed up. She wondered if the opposite was true for her. Maybe she no longer fit in little halfling chairs and tables, or the little halfling home she had once loved. It certainly felt smaller, these days.

"I'm glad she could Send a message to your family," Veth said. "So that you know they're safe. I'm sure you miss them."

"Of course," said Caduceus. "And it is good to know that they're safe. I'm glad that you could spend some time with your family, although I know it wasn't much."

"It was alright," Veth said. "Honestly, it's kind of strange to spend time with them while we're in the middle of adventuring. It's nice to be able to see them, and I love them both very much, but I love all of you as well. I end up feeling like I'm cheating them _and_ the Nein. Like I'm letting everyone down, in some way. It's like being torn in two."

"I understand that," Caduceus nodded. "Believe me, I do."

"Is that why you made a clean break with your family?" Veth said. "Sent them back to the Grove with Reani instead of us taking them there?"

"I mean," Caduceus shifted. "You all had already spent enough time on me, there were other things to do."

"We would have made time, Caduceus," Veth said. "We spent, what, three days getting your family business sorted? Maybe four? It wasn't the rest of us who were in a hurry."

"I know," Caduceus said, ears drooping. "It's easier to tell myself that. But you're right. It's… uncomfortable to be with them _and_ with the Nein. But not like being pulled in two. It's like… like being two people at once. Who I was with them, and who I am with you. It was strange."

"You could have taken some time with them though," said Veth. "We'd have given you space. Ten years is a long time to be apart."

Something flashed in Caduceus' eyes. For a moment, Veth could see the weight of those years, usually tucked away and borne secretly. It reminded her of Caleb, the way he sometimes lost himself in the past. It reminded her of her own eyes, reflected up from still and threatening water.

"Do you know what my mom said?" Caduceus spoke quietly, eyes focussed on his tea. "She said she thinks I'm the only one who could have saved them. Saved the Grove."

"It sounds like she's proud of you," Veth thought of Luc and her hopes for him. She thought of the kindness and help Caduceus continually showed. "I know I would be."

Caduceus looked up in surprise, ears lifting.

"But if that's true," he said, brow furrowed. "I shouldn't have waited ten years to leave. I should have been the first to go."

Veth thought about that, _really_ thought.

"Look," she said. "I don't know about fate and gods and all of that. I do know that parents don't always get it right. We try. But sometimes we mess up. And it's the worst thing, to mess up in a way that hurts your child. I think we both know that it wasn't your choice to stay, not really. Not when everyone else was choosing to leave. And Caduceus, you should not have been left alone for so long."

Caduceus' eyes were wide and wet. Veth could see his throat working, though no sound came out.

"I don't mean to judge your parents," she said. "They couldn't have known what would happen. But you were left in a terrible situation. And I'm glad that you ended up with us, but there was nothing good about the circumstances that brought us together. And it took a lot of faith and courage on your part to trust us, to leave with us and help us. No parent could expect more from their child. Not even a Wildmother."

They sat in silence as Veth's words settled. Caduceus gazed into his tea, looking a bit shattered. Tentatively, Veth left her seat to climb onto the couch beside him. Standing on the seat next to him, she wrapped her arms around his neck, petting his hair as she did with Luc when he was hurt or afraid. She felt Caduceus relax into the circle of her arms, breathing deeply as he worked through his feelings. Eventually, she pulled away, holding his face in her hands. She produced a handkerchief from her pocket and blotted away the wet streaks in his fur.

"Thanks," he said, smiling and unashamed as he met her gaze. "I think I needed that."

"Any time, Ducey," she said. "We're here for you."

She patted his head one last time before hopping down.

"I think we should both get some rest," she said. "I'll see you in the morning."

Caduceus nodded and walked her to the door. He kept watch as she ascended slowly through the center of the Tower. Once she was out of sight and she heard his door click shut, she paused.

 _Down,_ she thought, silently.

Quiet as a shadow, Veth drifted back to Caduceus' floor. She looked at his door, and Yasha's. Then, she turned to glare at the guest room door.

Standing there, Veth thought about family and responsibility. She thought about dangers, both internal and external, and how a person could drown on dry land under the weight of it all. She thought about her friends, how badly she wanted them all safe and cared for.

Then, gingerly, Veth extracted a banana peel from her bag. She carefully placed it in front of the guest room door.

Nodding to herself, she turned away, rising through the center of the tower to a peaceful night's rest.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, there it is. And tomorrow is Thursday again!  
> Thanks for reading, and for kudos and comments!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> Updates should be every other day.


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